Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Discovery of New Dragonfish Species That Survived 780,000 Years in Antarctica - Indian Defence Review

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Scientists Are Close to Replicating the First Living Thing - Yahoo

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

What are the most popular recruiting tools in the US?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why do women like black men?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Watch 'superorganism' created by tiny worms — the first time it's ever been spotted in the wild - Live Science

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have a reading level above third grade

I supercharged Google search with a three-key shortcut with custom results - Android Police

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Tyrese Haliburton's Calf Injury Worries NBA Fans as Pacers Lose G5, Face Elimination - Bleacher Report

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I can read

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Having read so much about Archie and Lilibet not actually existing, does anyone have any proof that they not only exist but that Meghan gave birth to them?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Users Are Leaving Google Drive for This 2TB Cloud Plan - PCMag

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Will norovirus surge early again this year? CDC urges tracking of new strain. - CBS News

I actually pay taxes

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can count

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I see through liars

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy bullshit

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday